I Am Afraid of Myself

I am afraid of myself on my darkest days.
And even sometimes on my good days too.

I am afraid of facing my real life.
I sleep instead of finding time for what mattes.

I am afraid of losing my temper with my kids.
I scroll through my phone rather than engaging in play.

I am afraid of my post-three-pregnancies body.
I dress is stretchy pants and flowy shirts to hide my supposed flaws.

I am afraid to fail.
I eat dessert to avoid facing the challenge of a healthy lifestyle.

I am afraid of who I have become.
I put on makeup each day to cover deep fears and flaws.

I am afraid of my potential.
I make excuses rather than pursuing my dreams.

I am afraid of myself.
I choose silence over speaking out.

And yet.

I find courage in Jesus.
I spend time in worship, prayer, and Scripture.

I find courage in community.
I make time for deep and honest friendships.

I find courage in the women around me.
I watch others speak out and begin to use my voice.

I find courage in myself.
I push through the struggle to the strength I have inside.


I discover that at the end of it all, my fear is eclipsed by courage.

Bible // Journal // Phone Case